What are the signs of family violence?

Children have a hard time telling an adult about their abuse, especially if they are being abused sexually. You may suspect a child is being abused if the child:

  • Has an injury (bruise, burn, fracture, abdominal or head injury) that cannot be explained.
  • Seems to have many accidents that are not always easily explained.
  • Seems afraid of a parent or other adults, such as teachers or baby-sitters.
  • Seems depressed, withdrawn, or even suicidal.
  • Refuses to go to school or church, or perhaps goes to school or church early and stays late.
  • Acts too old for his or her age, particularly in a sexual way.
  • Talks about being dirty or damaged, or is very concerned about their private parts.
  • Misbehaves, acts out, or even acts violently.

Adults
 You may suspect that a friend, co-worker or family member is being abused by her husband (or his wife), boyfriend (or girlfriend), or partner. Here are some signs:

  • You see visible bruises that go unexplained, or for which the explanations just don't make sense. Sometimes, you may notice the person attempting to hide bruising by wearing concealing clothing.
  • When with the partner, your friend will become quiet and passive. The partner seems to make all the decisions.
  • Your friend cancels on you at the last minute, doesn't show up for work, or misses church or other meetings.
  • Your friend’s children's behavior has changed. They seem withdrawn, or upset, or begin to bully other children.
  • Your friend's partner acts jealous of other people who pay attention to your friend and tries to prevent your friend from seeing other friends and family.
  • Your friend’s partner loses his or her temper easily. You may have seen the partner break something, throw something, yell at or threaten your friend.

Our Elders
 Our older family members may find it hard to tell someone if they are being abused. They may feel that they have no place else to go or no one else to turn to. But there are signs of abuse to look for:

  • Bruises or rope marks, particularly around the wrists, ankles or arms.
  • Unexplained injuries that seem to happen again and again.
  • Acting afraid or suspicious of others; not talking to other people.
  • Weight loss.
  • Bed sores.
  • Nervous, jumpy behavior, seems upset.
  • Looks or smells dirty.
  • Favorite possessions, jewelry, money or property disappears.

If you know someone in any of these situations, please help them.

To learn more:

Child Sexual Abuse
(The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry)
The Hidden Bruises are two of a series of "Facts for Families" education pamphlets developed to help parents and other adults identify and prevent child abuse.
https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide
/Child-Sexual-Abuse-009.aspx
Child Abuse - The Hidden Bruises
(The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry)
The Hidden Bruises are two of a series of "Facts for Families" education pamphlets developed to help parents and other adults identify and prevent child abuse.
https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide
/Child-Abuse-The-Hidden-Bruises-005.aspx
What is Domestic Violence?
A Safe Place, an Illinois based domestic violence prevention organization, gives a well-explained list of problems that can help abuse victims and friends of abuse victims.
https://asafeplaceforhelp.org/about/what-is-domestic-violence-2/
Elder Abuse and Neglect: In Search of Solutions
(American Psychological Association)
provides a clear explanation of elder abuse with examples that explain the problems, with information about prevention and where to get help.
https://www.apa.org/pi/aging/resources/guides/elder-abuse
The National Center on Elder Abuse
The National Center on Elder Abuse provides elder abuse information to professionals and the public; offers technical assistance and training to agencies and professionals; conducts short-term research; and assists with program and policy development.
https://ncea.acl.gov/

next » How do I know if I am a victim of family violence?

Written by: Laura Cousineau, M.L.S.
Reviewed by: Jim Hernandez, L.M.S.W.
Last Modified: Monday November 04, 2019 2:41 PM